Seasonal Depression

I have [severe]

Seasonal Depression.

I have struggled with Seasonal Depression, my entire life. Since I was little, I've thrived more often in those sunny, bright blue, skies. The long days, heat waves and frizzy hair seasons, were always my favourite. People often complained about the heat, but I still say "the hotter, the better".

The sun offers me so much productivity. It wakes me up so gently with those gorgeous rays, and allows me to rest so peacefully, as they set at night. The bright blue skies give me clarity, and energy, producing lively thoughts, high vibrations and the greatest spontaneity. Sunshine and warmth allow me to feel more, do more and be more.

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Some people don't suffer Seasonal Depression, at all. Some will go their entire lives, without ever experiencing it. Seasonal Depression is an unseen, livelihood-killer. SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder / Seasonal Depression) along with all Mental Illness', make it hard to relate to and understand. It is unseen and often, very unfamiliar to those around us.

Seasonal Depression affects my entire being.

Maybe I'm an extreme case, maybe I'm wired differently, or maybe I am perfectly normal to some. However, the truth is, I fucking struggle...bad.

Waking up exhausted, fatigued, and ready for the day to end before it even begins, is certainly not a fun way to live. I try to continue with my fitness regime, attend work and meetings, be a functioning human and proceed with my routine, but it's a struggle. It is a fucking struggle. Eleven hours of sleep, can't give someone like me, enough energy to muster on with my day.

I don't thrive in these dark, cold, gloomy months.

Guilt and shame kick in, and my irritability goes through the roof. I get frustrated with myself for being tired and lethargic, and proceed with further annoyance as my irritability is just obscene. It's a viscous cycle of shame-guilt-frustration-irritability-repeat. It sucks balls.

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People with Seasonal Depression are all wired differently. We go through different symptoms and phases at different times. Some people don't just struggle to get out of bed - some simply choose not to. They can't. They just cant even force themselves to get out of bed...

Truthfully, I've been there, and I battle with this one, currently.

There are others whom are fully functioning, but often on an auto-pilot mode. More unseen/unreported cases are accompanied with self-harm, while other patrons are simply crying and crying because they don't know how to cope. Emotional Eating, insecurities and sadness become extreme, and anger (self-directed) is often extensive. SAD makes holding relationships extremely difficult, as the dreary, cold, dark and wet weather, make activities challenging and bodies ache. Isolation increases, movement decreases and thriving optimally becomes minimal.

Seasonal Depression is a fknnnnnn bitch.

I said it, and dare I say it again.

SEASONAL DEPRESSION IS A FUCKING BITCH.

End rant.

Seriously. I know it's hard.

I know getting out of bed to go outside to snowy, wet, rainy, dark, cold conditions, is NOT fun. I understand that people are laid off from work, struggling to make ends meet, and bodies aren't being moved they way they were intended to be.

I get it, my friend. However, I am here to remind you, you are not alone.

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You are not here to suffer alone.

1. Try to keep a routine.

Wake up at the same time every day, proceed with a healthy morning routine and try to stay as close to this each day, as possible. It will give your body and mind, predictability and something to both rely on, and look forward to.

2. Move.

I know how hard it is to get motivated to go to the gym and exercise when going out in the weather is the last thing you want to do. The dark skies scream "lay in bed", while your body is begging for some blood-flow. Move. Even if it just a simple walk through the mall for twenty minutes. Move. Try to be active with a fitness routine, at home, or in a facility. Do yoga, join a group or a class to hold you accountable. Try embracing the outdoors by skiing, or snowboarding - heck, go snow-shoeing! Move. Somehow, just move.

3. Nourish yourself.

Eat whole foods that tell your body and brain to thrive. Processed food can fog your brain and disturb your gut bacteria. Try to eat whole, healthy foods as much as possible.

4. Get Vitamin D.

Some say don't use a tanning bed, while others will tell you to do so. Personally, I use a tanning bed to help me for both Vitamin D deficiency, and mood stabilizing. Tanning helps me relax through anxious and irritable moods. I also take Liquid Vitamin D each, and every day to assist with the deficiency.

5. Seek help.

See a doctor, therapists, friend, or teddy bear to help you through these harder times. Utilize your resources and supports, or create them for yourself. Sometimes, medication is avoided, but needed. Seek assistance and ask questions. You could be potentially low in vital nutrients creating worsening symptoms. Help manage these with professional assistance and testing. Don't be ashamed, my love. We all need to see a doctor when we are sick.

6. Be kinder to yourself.

I suckkkkkk with this one. I never forgive myself or ease up on my high-ass expectations. However, I am definitely going to tell you to forgive yourself. No one is perfect. I mean it. No one has a perfect day, week, month, year. We all struggle at times. Forgive yourself for needing rest, extra tender love and care or a warm hug in a cup (tea). Forgive yourself for feeling blue, and just proceed each day with your best efforts in that moment. I promise, this phase will pass.

Everything in life is temporary.

Everything in life is temporary.

Be kind to yourself and remember...

Everything in life is temporary.

I love you.

xo

dee